My darling little boy,
I love you so much that it is hard for me anytime I have to be away from you. Within an hour of being away from you all I want is to be home, or if you are out with dad have you home, and be able to hold you close to me and tell you that I love you. Sometimes when I think about you, hold you or watch you sleep I am filled with such an overwhelming love that fills every part of me, this is what unconditional love feels like and its something that I hope you area able to experience for your own child one day far into the future.

Most of this week you have been unwell, your reflux has been bad, you have had oral thrush again and with it being hot all week you have not been sleeping well but today you had a pretty good day. You didn't cry as much as other days and even let me put you down on your play mat for small periods of time when usualy you won't let me put you down at all. You don't like sleeping on your own during the day and while I am afraid that it will teach you bad sleeping habits I can't help but want to lay down with you and hold you close while you are sleeping. Every morning after your six o clock feed I take you back to bed with me so that the two of us can both get a little more rest before getting up for the day. During the day, usualy in the afternoon we have a nap together. I love these quite moments when you are sleeping peaceful and I can relax knowing that for this moment in time there is nothing that I have to do but be with you. I am so careful to place you away from where any pillows or blankets could fall on you and suffocate you and so careful to have you in the centre of the bed so that there is no way you could fall off. At first I was scared of having you in the bed with me but now that I am figuring out how to do it I don't feel afraid anymore, it feels right and natural. When you think how the rest of the world sleeps with their babies then this is the tradional way, it was normal for the baby and sometimes the whole family to share a bed with their parents in years gone past and sometimes i think that its sad that its now consider to be a bad thing.

I love you little man and hope that dad gets home with you shortly so that I can hold you in my arms, give you a kiss and tell you that I love you.

Love always
Mummy.